7 Key Differences Between Everyday Anxiety & an Anxiety Disorder
Anxiety is a normal part of everyday life.
Fear and anxiety and even panic have evolved as useful survival tools.
If there’s a threat to our survival, it behooves us to be able to activate our fight or flight system and GTFO. Know what I mean?
But fear and anxiety and panic that bleed into our everyday lives can sometimes push beyond what’s normal and become a disorder.
How do you know whether what you’re experiencing is anxiety or an anxiety disorder? I’ve got 7 key differences for you.
1. What triggers the anxiety
Everyday anxiety is often triggered by stress.
Things like an upcoming move, a job change, financial pressure, relationship difficulties, etc. can trigger anxiety.
The anxiety will typically go away once those problems are resolved.
But in an anxiety disorder, the anxiety, fear, or panic can come out of nowhere.
It doesn’t necessarily need a specific trigger to pop up.
2. When the anxiety occurs
Everyday anxiety often occurs in situations when there is an actual threat or danger.
So if you’re walking at night and someone runs up to you really quickly from behind, your brain will flag this as an actual threat to your safety, so your anxiety (actually, fear) response will be activated.
But in anxiety disorders, anxiety can occur even if there isn’t actually anything threatening or dangerous happening.
Not only can anxiety come out of absolutely nowhere (see difference #1), but it can also occur when your brain wrongly flags something as threatening or dangerous when it’s not actually.
So, when things like a relatively minor mistake, a blemish on your face, or a change in plans generate anxiety, that’s a sign that your brain is interpreting these small mistakes or perceived flaws as literally dangerous to your reputation, relationships, finances, health, etc.
3. How long the anxiety lasts
Everyday anxiety typically lasts as long as the stressor, threat, or danger lasts.
As soon as you’ve resolved the stress or gotten out of danger, the anxiety will dissipate pretty quickly.
But anxiety disorders are much more persistent.
The anxiety can be constant, lasting days, weeks, months, or even years at a time .
4. How extreme or excessive the anxiety is
When everyday anxiety is triggered, it’s usually based on a fairly accurate estimation of how dangerous or threatening a situation really is.
That means we’ll get more anxious about bigger things and less anxious about smaller things.
Anxiety disorders don’t tend to care how big the danger actually is.
In anxiety disorders, our brains get in the habit of overestimating how risky or dangerous something is, which means the anxiety becomes excessive or out of proportion to the actual situation.
So things like a typo in an email feel just as dangerous as someone breaking into your house…even if you know they’re not the same thing, your brain can’t tell the difference and you have a very similar emotional response.
5. How much the anxiety interferes with your everyday activities
Everyday anxiety doesn’t usually interfere with your daily activities or your ability to get ordinary things done.
Even if you’re stressed about a project at work, you still want to do all the things you’d normally do — your chores, hobbies, sleep and appetite, social engagements, etc.
But anxiety is much more disruptive in anxiety disorders.
At that level, the anxiety is disrupting your ability to engage in normal activities.
You don’t sleep as well, you stress eat or don’t eat enough, and you have to really work yourself up to do all the things you’d do if you weren’t anxious.
Be careful here, though: People with the perfectionistic form of anxiety often keep doing all the things they’d normally do even though they have pretty significant anxiety (even an anxiety disorder).
But they do the activities in a special way to accommodate the anxiety or they just push through and end up not enjoying their lives….which brings me to ………
6. How much the anxiety interferes with how much you enjoy life
Everyday anxiety doesn’t disrupt how enjoyable your life is.
It’s noticeable during the isolated times it shows up, but your health, comfort, and happiness aren’t compromised by it.
But in anxiety disorders, the anxiety is severe and persistent enough that your health suffers (GI problems, headaches, etc.), you feel uncomfortable all day long, and you don’t feel happy.
With an anxiety disorder, life feels much more difficult than it should.
7. How controllable the anxiety is
Finally, everyday anxiety is perceived as manageable.
It’s mild enough and transient enough that you believe you can stay ahead of it.
But anxiety disorders feel uncontrollable.
It’s intense and constant enough that you worry about going crazy, losing your cool, or being unable to keep it together.
A Chart Showing the Difference Between Anxiety and Anxiety Disorders
If you’re a visual person, grab this chart where I put it in a table so you can see side-by-side what the difference is between everyday anxiety and anxiety disorders.
Just like the difference between anxiety, fear, and panic, the line between everyday anxiety and anxiety disorders is ultimately arbitrary.
There’s no one thing that defines whether a person has ordinary anxiety or is dealing with an anxiety disorder.
Instead, it’s a combination of these 7 essential differences and a gut-check on how severe, persistent, and intrusive the anxiety is in a person’s life.
Ever wondered why you have an anxiety disorder while someone else just has everyday anxiety?
Next week, we’re keeping this conversation about anxiety alive as we talk about the three main things that cause anxiety disorders.
If you’ve ever wondered where anxiety comes from or why you have anxiety, I’ll tell you all about it next week. Don’t miss it.
Talk to you soon,
Dr. Finch
P.S. Remember, this is education, not treatment. Always consult with a psychologist or therapist about your mental health to determine what information and interventions are best for you. See the disclaimer for more details.
Hayden C. Finch, PhD, is a practicing psychologist in Des Moines, Iowa, dedicated to helping you master your mental health.
