Of course this is a reflective time of the year. Each year, we set similar goals, and by the end of the year we have to face the fact that we – yet again – didn’t achieve what we had hoped. After years and years of this, it can get pretty discouraging. But most of us keep it up and just set the same goals again, really believing that this time is different and this year will be the year we actually make the changes we want to make.
Why do we have so much trouble with New Year’s resolutions and goal-setting in general?
Most of the time, we’re excited about the goal and are super motivated to get going. We’ve just come off a week or two of Christmas vacation; we gave, received, and bought ourselves presents; we practiced being grateful; and we spent lots of time with the people we care most about. We’re refreshed, we’re ready to get going, and we’re serious about it.
We set a goal.
This year, we’re going to eat healthy, go to the gym, and lose a bunch of weight. And we go in hard. January 1, we’re at the grocery store stocking up on chicken, kale, and quinoa. We’ve downloaded recipes we think have a chance of being edible. We’ve remembered what gym we’ve been paying our membership fee to and checked their hours online. We’ve pulled out our tennis shoes from the bottom of the shoe pile and tried on our gym shorts to make sure they fit. We’ve charged our iPod (am I the only one still in the iPod generation?) and disentangled our earbuds. We packed it all in a bag and we.are.ready. We hit the gym, sweat a bunch, feel great about ourselves. We eat a tasteless dinner, have fruit for “dessert,” and feel accomplished. We keep this up day after day until January 20 when we are just dying for a night of the Real Housewives, sweatpants, and Haagen Dazs. Every.Single.Year. Why does this happen?
For goals to be successful, they need to have certain qualities.
A helpful acronym is to set SMART goals. SMART goals are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-Limited. Most of the time, our goals aren’t successful because they aren’t SMART goals. Here’s what a goal needs to be successful.
Most of the time, our difficulty accomplishing our goals is because we’ve missed at least one of the SMART components. With the gym example above, many of us feel the goal is highly relevant – we want to lose weight or increase our physical fitness and believe it is important for many reasons. And we often set a time limit (e.g., lost 20 pounds by the end of the year). But we often don’t set goals that are specific enough (e.g., “Go to the gym more” won’t cut it, neither will “Lose weight”), we don’t have a way to measure how we’re doing, and we do too much too soon. January 1, we come out of the gate running. We are so motivated and ready that we set a really fast pace for ourselves that ultimately can’t be maintained. We get frustrated with our unattainable goal and end up quitting. If it’s the tortoise and the hare, we try to be the hare. If we set more attainable goals, then we’re more likely to meet the goal, continue to feel successful, persist with the goal, and eventually achieve our goals. Be a tortoise.
So here’s how I would revise our gym goal.
This goal is a lot more specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-limited than the initial goal of “Go to the gym more.” And as a result, I’m much more likely to accomplish my goal.
Start now. What is your goal?
Take this chart and fill in the details to set a SMART goal. Remember, be a tortoise.
Hayden C. Finch, PhD,
is a practicing psychologist
in Des Moines, Iowa.
