What to Do When You Feel Overwhelmed with Life

You’ve been feeling overwhelmed for so long that you sometimes wonder whether that’s just the way it’ll always be. Even if life continues to be hectic, though, it’s possible to feel like you’re surfing on the waves rather than drowning underneath them. Here’s what to do when you feel overwhelmed with life.

How Our Culture Makes Life Feel So Overwhelming

The main reason we feel so overwhelmed with life is that we have too many responsibilities and expectations. Over the years, technology has given us tools to make a lot of things quicker and easier (like, when was the last time you washed your clothes by hand?). You’d think this would free up time and space in our lives, but instead we’ve just added even more. That’s a cultural issue that desperately needs to be resolved because it’s a major player in burnout, toxic self-criticism, imposter syndrome, and other mental health problems.

So the real solution to this problem is a complete overhaul of our cultural expectations.

Why Your Brain Feels Overwhelmed with Life

But short of that, let’s focus on what you can control right now, today. Part of the reason life feels so overwhelming is because our brains get confused. There are so many responsibilities to keep track of, so many problems to anticipate, so many concerns to juggle that our brains get overloaded.

Remember watching the hourglass spin on Windows 98? That was a signal that the computer was busy thinking and processing…and sometimes it would get stuck like that. Overwhelm is basically a signal that your brain is stuck, just like the hourglass. It’s trying to process, but it’s getting confused.

The solution, then, is to help your brain with that confusion. The antidote to confusion is organization.

What to Do When You Feel Overwhelmed with Life

When you feel overwhelmed with life, start making lists.

You can make organizational lists, such as

• A to-do list (super important: get absolutely everything out of your head and on to paper)
• A “ta-da” list (This phrase comes from Gretchin Rubin and represents items or projects you’ve already completed. Ta da!)
• Your priorities for this morning, today, this week, this month, or this year
• Important upcoming dates: Birthdays, appointments, etc.
• A shopping list
• Upcoming bills to pay and their due dates
• Your meal plan for the week
• Project lists, like the home repair projects you want to complete
• Chores to complete
• Gift ideas for birthdays and other holidays

You can also make feel-good lists, such as

• Things that inspire you
• People you love and why
• Family activity ideas
• Inspirational quotes or words that inspire you
• Personal or professional goals
• Your favorites: Favorite songs, movies, TV shows, books, etc.
• Your favorite jokes
• Local places you’d like to visit (museums, restaurants, touristy places, etc.)
• The happiest moments of your life so far
• Your bucket list
• Date night ideas
• Your own gift wish list

Or, try making coping lists, such as

• Things you’re grateful for this week (grab this free PDF for a full month of gratitude journal prompts)
• Your go-to coping strategies (maybe some of your favorites from the 30-day mental health challenge)
• Items in your self-care toolkit (here’s a 1-hour self-care night routine if your self-care toolkit is currently empty and 8 ways to practice self-care)
• Your current stressors and a plan for resolving them or coping with them
• Books to read, movies to watch, or podcasts to listen to

Why Lists Help with Overwhelm

Lists are a great way for your brain to get organized. When information just floats around aimlessly in our heads, our brains short-circuit. The lists help our brains process the information in an orderly manner. You know that bit of anxiety you get when you look at a haphazard closet versus the satisfaction you feel when you see a neatly labeled and organized closet? Lists help your brain move from haphazard to labeled and organized, and it feels that same sense of satisfaction.

Mental Health Self-Care Checklist

Last fall, you worked on your self-care by developing a toolkit of self-care activities and then turning that into a self-care night routine. Next week, we’re returning to the self-care conversation. There are six things your mental health self-care needs to include. I’ll tell you what those six components are and give you some strategies for putting them into practice. Don’t miss it.

Talk to you soon,

Dr. Finch

P.S.    Remember, this is education, not treatment.  Always consult with a psychologist or therapist about your mental health to determine what information and interventions are best for you.  See the disclaimer for more details.  

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